What a friend does during a divorce

Manassa & Neugebauer, P.C.

As January draws to a close, we suspect that the flurry of divorce actions we predicted in our prior posts have taken place. Whether an announcement has been made or a petition has been filed, those who are entering the throes of divorce need good friends. Divorce involves legal, financial and emotional changes, so while an attorney is an essential guide for legal issues, a friend can be there for emotional support.

With that said, the following are helpful things that friends can say (or do) to help someone through a divorce.

I support you – This can be shown through thoughtful words and gestures, whether they are cards of support, or by simply being there and listening.

Being empathetic – In the same vein, acknowledging how tough the situation is can be very helpful. It not only gives the divorcee sense that they are not alone, it also helps him or her understand that the divorce is not solely their fault. This is particularly important because a great deal of blame is placed during divorce.

Let’s get organized – This can be especially helpful if the divorce involves a great deal of information that must be procured and transferred (e.g. bank statements, investment pages, credit card records). Divorcees can also use help creating budgets and track spending as they prepare for a new life.

Let me help – This may be the most obvious, but helping with meals, cleaning, errands and children can be good for divorcees. Especially those who are having a tough time dealing with the specter of starting over.

Source: Huffington Post.com, 10 things every woman going through a divorce wants to hear, January 28, 2013

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What a friend does during a divorce